What’s your poison? Acrylic/canvas
“She nourishes the poison in her veins and is consumed by a secret fire.” ~Virgil, Ancient Roman Poet
Well, I know you are probably thinking…what the hell? Okay for some of you…what the heck? She posts a soft pink rose painting, and a few days later she posts about poison. Well, if you read my “about” on here this should not surprise you. I put the cards on the table that I am messed-up…paradoxical, even unto myself. I used to hide it, now I just don’t give a damn! Just remember…
I told you I was trouble…you know that I’m no good.
~Amy Winehouse / Back to Black (I love her..demons and all)
Ms Winehouse says it so much better! (hee, hee) god how I love music!!!
What does this poison bottle piece have to do with it? Well, it is another symbolic narrative self portrait. If you frequent here at all, you know I am a big quote person. Alas, this painting and quote fit perfectly for what I am thinking today. So if you want to have a peak into this crazy mind of mine read on…if not, I understand. You might want to come back on a heart or flower day, for there is no denying this seems a dark piece with a dark title.
There are some words that just stir up the mind and poison is such a word for me. I think we all have poisons. Too much of anything can be a poison. Of course, we all know about alcoholism, drugs, cigarettes, food, etc. I have some in my own family that struggle with those demons. I did not…my poison was more of a mind poison. For me it was a radical religion. (Radical is another word I like).
Now I truly hope I am not offending anyone. Whatever you do if it works for you great, and I reserve all judgements. I told you a while back that I was going to be myself on here. So I will speak the truth from my own experience. I wore a mask for many years and like the quote I had a secret fire burning, slowly consuming the facade.
I am not going to write a long boring post about my journey. I used to passionately speak out about my story, but now I simply speak through my art. I am no longer haunted by my history, but I no longer try to deny it either. I can’t escape it anymore than I can escape having green eyes…nor do I wish too. That in itself was liberating for me!
Today, I was thinking of such things….I tend to go back and forth from the light into the shadows. I hope this will help you understand me a little better, and why my art seems so conflicting at times. I guess it is how I continue to feed the poison that remains in my veins. :)
As for this piece….it no longer exists for I painted over it, though it still remains in my digital images and etched within my mind.
I still have secret fires burning, and may it ever be so!! :)
Please Note: Please speak freely here…I encourage it. Also, if anyone ever wishes to “talk” to me beyond the comments on here just email me…some do and I enjoy hearing from them. Whether it be about this subject or art….two things (among many) that I am passionate about.
Secret fires and good energies to all,
~gypsy he♥rt
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You need to take a couple of aspirin and elevate your feet.
Dr. Feelgood
“Dr Feelgood” gives excellent advice!
That painting is beautiful, in a dark way. It really provokes thought for me… You are truly an artisté!
As I said on my blog not too long ago, we cannot have the light without the shadows for there would be no depth in the world. Too many people see the shadows as being a bad thing instead of just another place we have to go, sometimes to rest, sometimes to rant and rave. All have their place and are essential to our beings to be healthy and to grow.
Wishing you solace and warmth in both the shadows and the light!
Just as I am compelled to write dark some of the time, and find it worthwhile, creatively stimulating and healthy, so it is with you to paint dark some of the time. Perhaps the question is one of balance. It is not in me to write ‘roses’ every day; usually I write in a more holistic fashion – I write ‘garden’ which includes dirt, seeds, and manure, sun, rain. And flowers, too.
And I do admire your ability to paint your ‘moment’, share it, and then destroy it – perhaps turn it into a work of a different color. Now that would be symbolic, wouldn’t it?
So, go , Gypsy, go. Go with your heart. (I personally find the painting hauntingly beautiful.)
Beautiful painting…so many layers of meaning and evocations here.
Going back and forth from the light to the shadows. I strongly relate to this!! I can’t get around that paradox in my work either. I must go from the most visceral, ethereal images to the most disturbing, unsettling images and back again. I think we all have varying shades of light and multiple hues of shadow, as well as who knows how many tones of personality not to mention poisons that we carry. It is so healing to be able to get all of them out into the artwork.
Thank god for art….the ability to express that which is incapable of words.
*wrJones*~ How about a couple of glasses of wine instead? :)
*Ethan*~ You made my yin yang heart smile! Thank you. Yes, Dr Feel good I told him he should be a stand up comic. You see my alternative to the asprin. :)
*Fox*~ I so agree, and I thank you for your kind words!
*Barbara*~ Maybe that is our connection..eh? It is good to paint over something..I have done so often.
Your words inspired me and I greatly appreciate that!
*Kalliope*~ I see it in your words and work too! Hmmm I never thought about it, but even poison can be sweet. Yes thank god for art especially when you think of the alternatives! :) Thank you love.
As you know, I travel from light to shadow and back again at the speed of sound. It’s all a part of me. I like reading and seeing things that reflect a complete person, good and bad. We can’t be happy all of the time, and so many have overcome incredible obstacles on their way to being the people that we care about and admire. If we knew what some people had endured on their journeys, we’d want to hug them all. It’s part of humanness, and I love it. I’m glad to see all of the stops on your journey, and I don’t care if you show pink roses or scary skeletons. It’s all you, and I love it all.
Thanks for sharing.
So funny. I often think I can only write, draw or paint, in the moments, in the spaces, between the heard melody of music.
Bring it on.
>*Moonbream*~ Girl…I do know it! I like that in a person too and everyone is so…just to more or less degrees and some are better at hiding it. :)
I am so glad you don’t care if it is pink roses or skeletons ..that’s how I feel about your words! As I told you one time “you are real” and I love real!
Thank you!
*SurfaceEarth*~ Me too! I love your “bring it on”…I don’t think I can stop myself! :) Thank you for “being”
Hello Dearest Gypsy-Heart~
Awesome freaking art piece and awesome freaking post!!!!
You know…just as everyone on their comments shared with you…DARK and LIGHT go together (like hot dogs and hamburgers). We need BOTH…to KNOW both!
It wasn’t until I TOTALLY accepted and embrace my darkness…that I was able to TOTALLY love myself.
Now…I just laugh at it!
There’s something so beautifully endearing about exposing darkness. And I so totally admire it!
I enjoy coming here and seeing ALL of you, Gypsy-Heart!
And love and appreciate it ALL….
Sharing good energy with you.
Thank you for this post.
*Ron*~ Thank you so much ..you know I’m crazy about you!! Yep darkness and light…both needed for growth. ..right? I tend to like the darkness at times..feels like home. :) You know how I enjoy your yin and yang sides!!
Good energy to you too!! Thank you for being!
Dearest Gypsy! I love this painting; the composition and colors and like Kalliope said, the way the images used conjure evocations. GREAT WORK as always! (PS: LOVED THE ROSE ONE TOO… It is a favorite rose of mine to grow and special to me. Because it is grandmothers favorite too)
*Sibyllae*~ So good to see your words! You made my heart smile with your comment..thank you.
I remember we share a great love of roses! So I am honored that you like that rose piece. :)
I love this work! I am left wondering what world is now living on top of it [the poison]? How does the new garden grow?
I’m so adding you to my blog roll, I love your work and words too. Thanks for coming by my place, I appreciate it.
Dear Gypsy-Heart,
My English skills are not good enough to comment on this one, but I DO understand what You’re saying here! The secret fire burning… It’s sort of “the other side of being” – the emotions/dreams You find SO hard to deal with, yet so impossible to disregard.
… and I love the painting!
If You want to, check this out – I tried to do a little something for my visitors from abroad:
http://lakealike.blogspot.com/2008/02/special-edition-for-my-friends-from.html
Sincerely,
Anni
*Anni*~ Hello Anni I think your English was perfect…I loved how you described “the secret fire!”
So happy you liked the painting!
I will be over in a bit to check out your post. :)
Wow gypsy- That was interesting!! I think you left me hanging, a bit of a cliffhanger blog. : )
Christy
*babysoup*~ Glad you found it interesting.
I guess “secret fires” are cliffhangers…eh? :)
I’ll be over to see your new painting in a bit.
It’s a wonderful piece of art. I actually flinched when you wrote you painted over it, but then again, I’ve written poems, tore them up and let them fall to the winds.
We all live in ambivalence, such is the nature of the thinking being. It’s difficult when we can find no solutions or fixes to our feelings, and situations, and then our lives become yo-yos–we go up and down.
But then, feelings change. This I have learned the hard and long way. Feelings do change and so do secret fires.
What’s that old saying, Desire hath no rest. Great blues.
**Jane~ Glad you liked the piece, and yes it is gone, all painted over….in fact it was in a previous post about painting over pieces.
“Fall to the winds” I like that! You paint with words!
So true about the nature of the thinking being.
Ahh yes….”Desire hath no rest” :) I so agree about the secret fires changing! Thank goodness right…evolving ever evolving.
Thank you for you comments I enjoyed them very much!
Thank you for thanking me for “being”. That’s about the coolest thing I have heard in awhile. Peace.
**SurfaceEarth~ How kind of you to come here to say that…but you most certainly don’t have to thank me!
I do thank you for “being” you are a wonderful creative soul! :)
Wow this really got the feedback flowing. I like it too.
I follow your inviting, see: http://renedesor.wordpress.com
a smith opened my closed drawing-locker. the promised image – I think you remember – appears now on my blog
with french title “alignement direct” I signed 10 07 1996
about your recent article I just can say there is no poison itself but man who craves for illumination, enlightenment & immortality & is endangered to get addicted on his search to reach that with different expedients. – & I received that by own experience.
**nouveaufauves~ Glad you like it. Yes there has been some very interesting comments! Mayve I shouldn’t have painted over it! Hee, hee,
** Rene’~ So glad you followed me here..maybe you can find it easier now instead of trying to go through my art web site
I loved your comment about this post subject. I totally agree with you!!
I do like to stir things up now and then too see what everyone thinks. I admit though once in a while I’ll have a day bordering on bitterness concerning my own past stupidity…then I remind myself that all is and was as it should be. Even poison can be sweet!!!
I will be over in a bit to see that image you posted for me. I’m so happy you were able to get the lock open! :)